REGARDING your problem about the healing of sickness. First, try to realize that if you are to be used in that way, you will be made to do it; you cannot help yourself—you will feel the urge so strongly that you must obey. Therefore, do not concern yourself about it, but trust all the Loving Healer within. Besides, are you sure that you are wise enough to know when to heal and whether you should relieve anyone of the inharmony caused by his own mistakes, indiscretions or sins, and before he has learned his lessons from them? Unless you are able to point out clearly the lesson to everyone seeking relief, no real healing can be accomplished. The true healing came only by teaching such a one the spiritual truths that will show him the cause of his being in such condition, and that is what you should study and pray to attain before you seek to be able to heal.

ANSWERING your question, if your trying to follow the teachings in our lessons brings only discord and turmoil, it can mean only one thing,—if you are truly seeking the Kingdom making the finding of it first in your life, then you are being tested to prove if you are worthy and capable of following in the way shown.

Do you not realize, dear friend, that by wanting to find the Kingdom and then really trying to live these teachings, it immediately arouses all the lower qualities and forces of self that have had their way with you so long, and that naturally rebel against being disturbed in such dominating control? Likewise, if you only know it, the discord and turmoil resulting is intended by your Higher Self to show to you clearly these qualities so that you may know them for just what they are, and with His help will make a determined effort to overcome them and remove them from your life. Think this over carefully, until you get its full meaning.

The teachings in the lessons are for just that purpose; you have asked to accompany us to the Kingdom, but can you not see that you cannot take along any of those qualities of self—that everything of self must be left behind? Also can you not see that if everything were right within you there would be nothing then to attract discord, inharmony and turmoil; nothing that could be disturbed or upset by anything that could come to pass?